Pretty pictures, bad chat

Why is it that bad food and bad dates seem to go hand in hand? I know I’ve talked about this in the Hot n’ Cold entry but it’s a genuine philosophical question that I demand to know the answer to.

It’s like the chefs can sniff a date of plague-like pestilence coming down the road for miles and think to themselves “Ha! I know what can really put the icing on the cake. I shall create a dish of such terribleness, such repulsiveness that whatever small shard of enjoyment these two people might possibly have got from this evening shall be completely obliterated into infinity and beyond”.

That’s how it felt last night anyway when quite frankly I was on the worst date I’ve ever been on in my life. No joke. It was bad. The food wasn’t far behind either. The culprits? Date-wise a German in a sulk, food wise fish and chips. Now the latter might be my fault. Yes I’m in Bali and I ordered fish and chips but I was driven to it by the bad date, it just made me a little, little crazy. But what I got I in no way deserved.

I got little bits of battered dark burnt fish and fried crisps. Yes, chips in the American manner i.e potato chips that had been fried until they too were burnt to a crisp. I only wish I had a photo to show you but I was so horrified that all rational thought went out of the window.

If it wasn’t for the fact that Aussie Rules was on the TV blaring right in front of us, I’d probably have burst into tears, but it’s just not dignified to be crying when there are so many cute guys in front of you, even on TV. As for the German, he barely roused himself to say a word throughout the whole meal (safe to say there won’t be a repeat). Except to laugh at my crisps, which was just too much. It made me feel a little like this.



This was going to be the beginning of my Phuket Thai food entry, but as you can see, I digressed. So that can wait until another day. And instead, here are some pictures from the last couple of weeks on the road. Just to remind me that along with the bad food and dates, there are some really not so bad things to balance it out...


Railay, Krabi Province, Thailand


Beach nearish Kuta, Bali

I heart Jack Johnson because we love the same stuff yeah

I lost an entry. I really don’t know how I did it but I wrote it up in one of the three books I’m travelling with (one for me, one for other people to write in and one for article stuff) and now it has disappeared.

It was probably the best blog entry that I’ve ever written. I can tell you it was witty, fascinating and would make your stomach rumble ominously, but now it’s gone and I have to replace it with this (probably substandard) blog post. It’s like Tenacious D’s Tribute to the Best Song in the World, this one will be nothing like the original, if only because I wasn’t wittering on about how I lost a blog post because at that point I hadn’t.

Now you know that you’ve been in my thoughts, lets move on. Banana Pancakes in Laos. I really don’t think you understand. Banana Pancakes in Laos.



I hope it is beginning to sink in. Because they are truly amazing. I’m getting ahead of myself, I’ll go through the steps that helped me come to this conclusion.

In South-East Asia, it seems you can never escape the one dollar syndrome. Tramping around the temples of Angkor and trying to soak up the atmosphere ‘Lady you want postcards? Waaaaan daller only’. Your reply ‘No, no postcards for me thanks.’ Theirs ‘but it’s only waaaannnn daaaaallllller’ (This can go on indefinitely until you get frustrated and walk away). Tuk tuks – one dollar, large bottle of water – you guessed it. Wan daller. But the most useful and enjoyable way I’ve found to spend my dollar is in Vientiane, the undisputed kind of banana pancakes.

If Jack Johnson hadn’t pipped me to the post, I’d be tempted to write a song about these gloriously sticky confections. Made from a super thin dough (my Laos doesn’t stretch to ingredients, but as far as me and my hand gestures could tell it was a flour, water and egg mix), thinly-sliced banana and lashings of condensed milk topped with a bit of sugar.

In theory it should be easy to replicate at home, just make sure you get the dough really thin, add the sliced banana to the top, fold the four corners into the middle, put it into the pan with some oil and fry on both sides. Once this is done, drizzle condensed milk (lots of) over the pancake, fold again, put back on the fire and serve immediately after, steaming hot and ready to go.

Waaan daller pancake. Million dollar taste. Now it’s time to write your crappy postcards that you couldn’t help but buy.